Title: Blood Lead Concentrations Among Pediatric Patients with Abdominal Pain; A
Prospective Cross-sectional Study
Version: 1 Date: 22 Jun 2021
Reviewer's report:
ABSTRACT
In methods, change "quired" to "queried"
BACKGROUND
I think the authors should consider reorganizing the background a bit. I found myself wondering
the relevance of this type of inquiry in Tehran at the end of paragraph 2. Paragraph 3 provides
the rationale, but as the reader, I needed this sooner. I would consider including some of this
"why" in paragraph 1 - you don't necessarily need to move all of paragraph 3 forward, but I think
you need to pull the audience in better at the beginning.
METHODS
-Line 6, remove extra space between age and comma
-You mention excessive spices and herbs - what's excessive? How was this asked?
-In the description of the Lead care II device use in the methods, perhaps mention if this is via
fingerprick. Was an alcohol wipe use before hand? (to decrease false positive, remove topical
confounders)
RESULTS
-Can you clarify whether the patients were admitted to either of the two hospitals, or seen in an
outpatient setting (or both)? It's not clear.
-Change sentence 3 (latter half) to say "were from Tehran City and another 78..."
-End sentence 3 after "question". Start next sentence with "Figure 1"
-Decide on consistency with capitalization: Tehran City vs Tehran city
MAP
-Numbers are hard to see in the gray districts (for example, 4, 5, 15). Consider bolding.
DISCUSSION
-The finding elevated BLL was significantly more common in children <5 years is the result
that I care most about based on what you've presented. Somehow I think it gets buried under
other results that are less impactful or meaningful for me
-Did you ask about child hand/mouth behaviors? If not I would be clear that that is an inference
-Ensure that abbreviations are previously spelled out and defined (CDC, GI, for example)
-add space between "abovementioned"
-You may need to define schooling certificate for some readers (equivalent of high school
diploma?)
-"Who were referred" should be phrasing in sentence that starts with Ataee
LIMITATIONS
-Decide of consistency for using colon after heading
-"sample size making" should say "sample size makes"
CONCLUSIONS
-We cannot identify causality based on this study
Title: Blood Lead Concentrations Among Pediatric Patients with Abdominal Pain; A
Prospective Cross-sectional Study
Version: 1 Date: 22 Jun 2021
Reviewer's report:
ABSTRACT
In methods, change "quired" to "queried"
BACKGROUND
I think the authors should consider reorganizing the background a bit. I found myself wondering
the relevance of this type of inquiry in Tehran at the end of paragraph 2. Paragraph 3 provides
the rationale, but as the reader, I needed this sooner. I would consider including some of this
"why" in paragraph 1 - you don't necessarily need to move all of paragraph 3 forward, but I think
you need to pull the audience in better at the beginning.
METHODS
-Line 6, remove extra space between age and comma
-You mention excessive spices and herbs - what's excessive? How was this asked?
-In the description of the Lead care II device use in the methods, perhaps mention if this is via
fingerprick. Was an alcohol wipe use before hand? (to decrease false positive, remove topical
confounders)
RESULTS
-Can you clarify whether the patients were admitted to either of the two hospitals, or seen in an
outpatient setting (or both)? It's not clear.
-Change sentence 3 (latter half) to say "were from Tehran City and another 78..."
-End sentence 3 after "question". Start next sentence with "Figure 1"
-Decide on consistency with capitalization: Tehran City vs Tehran city
MAP
-Numbers are hard to see in the gray districts (for example, 4, 5, 15). Consider bolding.
DISCUSSION
-The finding elevated BLL was significantly more common in children <5 years is the result
that I care most about based on what you've presented. Somehow I think it gets buried under
other results that are less impactful or meaningful for me
-Did you ask about child hand/mouth behaviors? If not I would be clear that that is an inference
-Ensure that abbreviations are previously spelled out and defined (CDC, GI, for example)
-add space between "abovementioned"
-You may need to define schooling certificate for some readers (equivalent of high school
diploma?)
-"Who were referred" should be phrasing in sentence that starts with Ataee
LIMITATIONS
-Decide of consistency for using colon after heading
-"sample size making" should say "sample size makes"
CONCLUSIONS
-We cannot identify causality based on this study
Please review this paper.
user
Title: Blood Lead Concentrations Among Pediatric Patients with Abdominal Pain; A
Prospective Cross-sectional Study
Version: 1 Date: 22 Jun 2021
Reviewer's report:
ABSTRACT
In methods, change "quired" to "queried"
BACKGROUND
I think the authors should consider reorganizing the background a bit. I found myself wondering
the relevance of this type of inquiry in Tehran at the end of paragraph 2. Paragraph 3 provides
the rationale, but as the reader, I needed this sooner. I would consider including some of this
"why" in paragraph 1 - you don't necessarily need to move all of paragraph 3 forward, but I think
you need to pull the audience in better at the beginning.
METHODS
-Line 6, remove extra space between age and comma
-You mention excessive spices and herbs - what's excessive? How was this asked?
-In the description of the Lead care II device use in the methods, perhaps mention if this is via
fingerprick. Was an alcohol wipe use before hand? (to decrease false positive, remove topical
confounders)
RESULTS
-Can you clarify whether the patients were admitted to either of the two hospitals, or seen in an
outpatient setting (or both)? It's not clear.
-Change sentence 3 (latter half) to say "were from Tehran City and another 78..."
-End sentence 3 after "question". Start next sentence with "Figure 1"
-Decide on consistency with capitalization: Tehran City vs Tehran city
MAP
-Numbers are hard to see in the gray districts (for example, 4, 5, 15). Consider bolding.
DISCUSSION
-The finding elevated BLL was significantly more common in children <5 years is the result
that I care most about based on what you've presented. Somehow I think it gets buried under
other results that are less impactful or meaningful for me
-Did you ask about child hand/mouth behaviors? If not I would be clear that that is an inference
-Ensure that abbreviations are previously spelled out and defined (CDC, GI, for example)
-add space between "abovementioned"
-You may need to define schooling certificate for some readers (equivalent of high school
diploma?)
-"Who were referred" should be phrasing in sentence that starts with Ataee
LIMITATIONS
-Decide of consistency for using colon after heading
-"sample size making" should say "sample size makes"
CONCLUSIONS
-We cannot identify causality based on this study
assistant